Angry Cunt Music

Someone, I cannot remember whom, remarked that all the angsty music ranging from mildly annoyed to angry to raging was brilliant. He called it 'Angry Cunt Music' and absolutely loved it all.

There're quite a few categories of Angry Cunt. From being pissed off with life and people to the world in general. The biggest category of ACM is however, "Being Pissed Off With Men". Alanis Morrisette started it going big with You Oughta Know. Of course she made it happen by using the word 'fuck' in her lyrics. She sang it at the Grammys and probably got a standing ovation for being a chick with balls. Hell, they give you a standing ovation at Grammys just as long as your song is angry, demanding change or about homeless and/or abused people.

We then encountered the strong female lead by Shania Twain. If You're Not In It For Love, You're Outa Here. And she'll probably kick you outa wherever 'here' is. With a chick that looked and had a body like that, not every guy woulda been in it for love actually. Personally, I would have been there for the money. After that came That Don't Impress Me Much. Which was good for people like me who couldn't compete with other guys who had the looks, money and muscles. Along with all that came The Sensitive Male Poofter who would swear to love some girl forever regardless of her looks, intelligence or state of health. You know what? Neither Angry Cunt nor Sensitive Poofter ever believed what they were singing.

Shania Twain earns enough not to give a flying fuck about some guy's wealth, looks or car. Also she's married to her producer and songwriter. Better not piss off the goose with the golden eggs.

Sensitive Poofter just wants pussy.

He ain't getting any.

The songs and videos making the big time now are black guys who may or may not have served time who want chicks to take off all their clothes (cos it's gettin hot wherever they happen to be) and get jiggy with it. This is what proves what girls have always known and guys are only beginning to realise. If a guy goes out making it goddamn obvious that he thinks a girl is hot and he wants to fuck her, chances are he is in fact, going to get to fuck her. Only these days the phrase 'fucking' is the last bit of machismo that guys can hang on to. Guys don't get fucked. Girls do. Only these days you'd better have a orgasm ratio of your one to her five or the word that you can't fuck properly is making the rounds. Guys had better walk around with chests out saying they fucked Britney or Zoe last night while they can cos the way things are going one day fucking might end up referring to guys being fucked no matter who does the actual penetrating.

Anyway. Back to the Angry Cunt Music.

Case in question: Kelly Clarkson - Since U Been Gone vs. Marion Raven - Break You.

You may call me 'Your Honor'.

Here we have two young females obviously pissed off with their ex-boyfriends. First ruling goes against Ms. Clarkson for the unimaginative Prince style spelling error which went out long ago with shoulder pads and Sensitive Black Male Poofters. In her favour, the only thing which sells the whole song is the absolutely brilliant use of the words, "yeah...yeah!" in the chorus. I love it.

Marion Raven has the unfair advantage that I've seen her in person and think that she's absolutely beautiful. More so than her pictures and videos. The blonde girl in M2M, Marit What's-her-name, is as is.

Never mind the lyrics. Not hard to figure out. Don't even have to. What speaks absolute volumes in each situation are the respective videos.

Kelly trashes her ex's place gleefully and exits just before ex comes home with new girlfriend.

Marion throws her ex's stuff out of HER place and burns the shit up.

Having seen both videos, lyrically, this is what I figure. Kelly was friends with this guy who tried and succeeded to get into her pants. I'm guessing 'that stupid love song' she fell for was by a Sensitive Poofter. Once she got dumped she went bananas and smashed up his place. Did she need to do that if she was so moving on? Opinions welcome.

Marion loses points for appearing to be a wide eyed blur girl who can't tell her boyfriend's sticking his dipstick into other cars. Gains points for the chorus bit which implies that once she's realised what's going on he can go fuck himself (or the other birds he's been fucking instead of her). Here's the thing, the setting is that the place is hers and she burns all his shit outside since he's too chicken to come back to get it. I would be too if I were him. Hell hath no fury like an Angry Cunt.

So Kelly is this whiney little bitch who'll break the toys you don't let her play with while Marion stands up for herself and gets on with it after reversing the situation.

Now, who got the Grammys?